Bud or bloom

“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”
– Anais Nin

A rose in the bud shows some of its color, but its true potential can’t be seen until it opens. It’s only a shadow of what’s to come.
In opening, it faces the risk of being bruised, crushed underfoot, losing some of it’s petals, and having its color fade.
But in opening, it is also able to give fragrance and beauty to an entire room.
It can tell someone, “I love you, I’m sorry, Get well soon, or Thank-you.”
It can brighten someone’s day and make a lasting impact on that person.
It can make a difference without even knowing it has.
A rose is safe in the bud.
It is protected in the bud.
It is comfortable in the bud.
But a rose bud will die eventually, and if it hasn’t opened, its God-given purpose and glory will die with it.
So we all have a choice – to choose the safe, the familiar, the comfortable, or to step out of our comfort zone, reflect our purpose & make a difference.

Mixed emotions

Today is a day of mixed emotions. 
I began the day sorting through some boxes and bags of items (that had been in storage) for a Salvation Army pick-up scheduled later today. As I went through some of my children’s and late husband’s things, memories washed over me – but they were happy memories, and I smiled and was grateful. 
As I carefully folded the sheets and bedding that he had used while in hospice, as I packed up some of his clothes, I remember being so grateful that I had no regrets and was able to be there with him as he took his last breath on earth two years ago.
As I sorted through toys and stuffed animals, I remembered why each had been special at one time to my kids. In a way, It felt like the end of Toy Story 3. I reflected over the past two years and realized I have so many things for which to be grateful. And I smiled.
Today is also a milestone day for me in my business for several reasons. The week had been a very challenging week. But yesterday, I was promoted to the highest permanent compensation level and it showed up online officially today. This month I also qualify for the BMW car bonus and will be with friends this afternoon picking up my BMW. So today is also a great day of celebrating what is possible with family, family, & friends.
I reflected over all of my incredible small business and family plan clients who have trusted me to help them protect their legal and identity-theft needs. I’m blessed weekly by your stories of how the law firm or our licensed investigators have helped you have peace of mind as you navigate some of life’s issues and storms. I smiled and was grateful to have you as part of my life and for allowing me to serve you.
I thought of my LegalShield family and my wonderful team. You encourage me daily and I am so blessed to serve you and help you to achieve your goals and dreams. I want to help you celebrate every small victory until you too also may experience a day like today. My mentors and coaches are the best. And my accountability partners have become some of my best friends. 
So I  smiled, and was grateful.
I thought of my kids who have weathered their own storms and have been overcomers. Our family motto since Bryan was diagnosed became “Finish Strong.” And they have exemplified this as they have pushed through their pain and loss toward what God has for them to do. There have been some bumps in the road as they are writing their own story that will encourage others. But they are pressing on…so I smiled and was grateful.
I thought of my community and church family who have loved on us and supported our family as we walked through our storms. I’m blessed beyond belief with so many incredible friends who touch my life daily. Your hugs and words of encouragement make my life very special and I’m grateful.
I thought of what it possible and how our lives will continue to change in 2014 as we set new goals, grow, and keep moving forward. Again, I smiled and was grateful. 
We go THROUGH things in life so that we may comfort, encourage, and help others who face the same storms. I’m grateful that you all have welcomed us into your lives. As I say often, faith, family, & friends make the difference allowing us to positively impact lives. So thank-you. 🙂

“We have to go through the TEST to get the TIMONY
Through the MESS, to have a MESSAGE
And can choose to be a VICTIM or a VICTOR”

Sigh

Sigh.
Sometimes bad things happen to good people.
Well, it was true. And deep down, I had known it for some time.
When we had gone to Oregon for a college weekend, someone had broken into our mobile storage shed and stolen some things. Sigh.
I didn’t really want to know what all was gone, because I already knew.
But today was the day a friend helped me to unload the entire shed so that it was ready for them to pick up this week.
And as we took things out, sorted them, loaded them to go to my parents’ home, charity, into our home, etc., it was confirmed.
They had stolen some valuable items – things I had bought for my daughters and nieces for gifts. But they also took items that were worth nothing in resale, but irreplaceable.
In one box was our wedding album, photos of our years together in the military, and other mementos I had displayed at my late husband’s memorial service. They were in the shed so that they wouldn’t be packed up with the other items when we had water damage. In hindsight, wish I had let them be packed up with the other things. Sigh.
In another box were extra copies of his Memorial Service program, bookmarks we had given to attendees, copies of the journal we kept when he had been going through chemo to fight the cancer.
It’s sad that all of these items were probably carelessly discarded when the thieves realized they had no value to them.
So yes, it makes me sad, a little angry, and upset that my children and their children will not have access to these precious memories. Sigh.
But as in life, I can choose to move on despite the pain. And that’s what we have chosen to do.
So if you happen to be at a yard sale, swap meet, or similar event and see a bright white wedding album with our photos in it, please let me know. 
Otherwise, hug those you love, make and cherish the memories. You never know when they might be gone.

Two years later

Well, it’s hard to believe it has been two years
But now I smile at things that used to bring tears
The memories of many cherished times together
Clinging to each other in sun & stormy weather 

Sometimes it seems like yesterday you were gone
But at other times, a lifetime that you’ve been home
We’ve made it thru all of the first special days
When it’s even more real that you’ve gone away

Your legacy continues through the lives you touched
And through those who loved & miss you so much
Your life made a difference, that is so true
I hear it from friends who still talk about you

We remember your strength even in pain
Looking for the rainbow in dark times of rain
So as we reflect on the significance of today
We will take a moment to pause and to say

Thank-you for all of the time we shared
For your love, example, & showing you cared
We’re pressing on with new hope, goals, and dreams
Even though life isn’t always what it seems

We will be grateful for all the time we had
Instead of letting years we don’t have make us sad
As we remember the day you took your last breath
We commit to making the most of the time we have left

To honor your memory, to “finish strong”
And to make an impact all life long
So until our time on this earth also ends
We will live daily, grateful for faith, family, & friends

3/12/2014 
Diane M Kephart

So many questions

I lost a friend this past week. He was my age.
None of us saw it coming. There are so many questions. “Why didn’t we see his level of despair? What could we have done to help “pull him back from the cliff?” What made him feel so hopeless that he saw suicide as the only answer?”  Yes, he took his own life. And we didn’t see it coming.

He was not just an acquaintance. Our kids had grown up together. He had been instrumental in my son’s life during his teenage years. We are all shocked, saddened, during this surreal time. It almost seems like a bad dream, but we are awake. Time momentarily slowed when we heard the news.

So what can we all learn from this? One thing is that we need to be more vulnerable to each other and to be a safe place for each other where we can admit we are hurting or struggling. Life is messy. Life hurts. And we need to be able to help encourage, uplift, and walk through challenges with each other. We can only do this when we know what challenges we are facing.

It takes real relationships, not superficial ones. Asking each other how we really feel – and being ok with hearing the truth instead of, “I’m fine.” How many times do we ask each other, “How are you?” and instinctively we answer, “I’m good.” or “Great!” when that may not be the whole truth. I want my friends to know it is ok to be real with me. And know that I will be there for them to help, not judge them for the way they feel or the struggles they face.

Since I also lost a spouse, I’m uniquely equipped to help his wife walk through this unexpected, dark time. Please keep her and their kids in your prayers. I pray that some lasting good comes from this tragedy and that we all learn something important.

After he passed, several of my friends and I talked about being the kind of friend that you could call at 2am in a crisis or just because you are in a dark place and know that it will be ok, we will answer, and listen or pray with and for you. Or if need be, we will get dressed and drive across town to be with you. I want to be that kind of friend for you. I pray that we all have or find someone to be that kind of friend, and that we will invest in others and be that kind of friend. 

Blessings.

“When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand.”
– Henri Nouwen

Ah Tucson

(I wrote this during the week following the Jan. 8th tragedy. Friends were shot. Friends lost loved ones. I heard about the shooting as my son and I left Phoenix after attending a tremendous Arizona Fellowship of Christian Athletes Fiesta Bowl breakfast. The news was telling us that Gabby Gifford was dead, but I refused to believe it and prayed for her the whole way back to Tucson. She did survive. Many hugs to my friends whose lives were forever changed on that day.)

Ah, Tucson.
Your heart is broken & grieving but still beating & beginning to heal.
Your spirit is strong & resilient.
Your hands are reaching out to comfort others in service and love.
Your arms encircle them with a silent hug.
Your feet are taking you to where there is the greatest need.
Your back is helping to carry the burden.
Your shoulder is there to lean upon.
Your eyes see the pain and shed tears, but shine in encouragement and hope.
Your head is bowed in prayer for the victims & their families.
This is my city that I love.
– Diane M. Kephart 1/12/11

Christmas in heaven

Christmas in Heaven

1. We remember Christmas when you were here
We hung the ornaments, shared hugs and tears
We opened the presents and laughed and prayed
Trying to enjoy a special Christmas Day
We knew that soon you’d be leaving
But tried to keep the thought far from our minds
We cherished the time spent together
Clinging to any joy we could find

Spring came and you were gone
We were grateful you were safely home
We were left here to carry on, to finish strong
With the strength you had shown

(Chorus)
Now you celebrate Christmas in Heaven
You get to hear the angels sing
Just like they sang for the shepherds
Who went to worship a baby
But you’re worshipping the King
The lights you see are more beautiful
Than any lights we will ever see
And you get to walk on streets of gold
While we hang gold ribbon on our tree
We look at the stars in the dark sky
You get to see the glory above
You’re spending Christmas in heaven
As you celebrate, we hope you feel our love

2. We went caroling to the neighbors
You sang praises unheard on earth
We read the Christmas story and sang Silent Night
You have eternity to marvel at His worth
We saw the flicker of candlelight
While you see flames surrounding His throne
While you celebrate Christmas in Heaven
We are left here to celebrate alone

(Chorus)
As you enjoy Christmas in Heaven
You get to hear the angels sing
Just like they sang for the shepherds
Who went to worship a baby
But you’re worshipping the King
The lights you see are more beautiful
Than any lights we will ever see
And you get to walk on streets of gold
While we hang gold tinsel on our tree
We look at the stars in the dark sky
You get to see the glory above
You’re spending Christmas in heaven
Still we hope you feel our love

(Bridge)
Though we miss you and your smile
We know you’re where you need to be
But the season makes us wish you were here
Like the fire in the fireplace
The memories still warm us
Please forgive us if we shed a tear

As we hear you say…

(Chorus)
I’m spending Christmas in Heaven
And get to hear the angels sing
Just like they sang for the shepherds
Who went to worship a baby
But I’m worshipping the King
The lights I see are more beautiful
Than any lights you will ever see
And I walk each day on streets of gold
While you hang gold ribbon on our tree
You look at the stars in the dark sky
I get to see all the glory above
I’m spending Christmas in heaven
Someday, we’ll be together again….

So though we really miss you
Please know our hearts are with you…
Enjoy Christmas in Heaven
Knowing one day, we’ll be together again

Lyrics and music by Diane M. Kephart
Copyright 12/21/12

Gratitude

This was shared at church on Sunday. Being grateful is a choice. May we all remember this as we celebrate Thanksgiving this week. Blessings.

https://www.dropbox.com/s/uexaiqlnpkmgp6e/GRATEFULNESS.mov

The watch

“Living is painful. Without pain, reality would escape us and the lessons the world has for us will go untaught.”
― Jamie Magee

One of my favorite movies is “Somewhere in Time” with Jane Seymour and Christopher Reeve. He is able to convince himself he is living in a different time and place…until a penny from the current century harshly shocks him back into reality.

I had one of those reality moments earlier today.

The reconstruction is completed after the water damage earlier this year. Today, workers were moving the boxes and furniture back into the house. They had been in an outside storage mobile shed for months.

As I went through some of the boxes, It was somewhat fun and almost like a treasure hunt to find items that had been packed away and unavailable for months. It was fun until reality hit full force. And I caught my breath.

Like Christopher Reeve’s character, I’d been doing well moving on in the 18 months since my late husband passed from cancer. But today, when I lifted a photo and piece of paper from the box through which I was sorting, there it was…

His watch. 

It was still keeping time even though it had been a long time since being worn. When I lifted it, the steel band made the same sound I had heard so many mornings when he lifted it from the night stand to put it on. Just as in the movie, memories came flooding back as reality hit me squarely in the face. 

I know every day that he is gone and that I’m alone. But today it was a little more painful than usual. The next item was his wallet with the family photos still there where I had seen them every time he opened it. Ouch.

The blessing today was that immediately after this happened, I went to a scheduled mastermind luncheon with wonderful women entrepreneurs. They are dear friends and balm to my soul. I’m so grateful for Faith. Family. Friends.

We will all face pain and loss as we go through life. We will all move on. But on the days when reality slaps you in the face and stings, I pray you also have friends who care.

And that you can be that friend for someone else.

Blessings.

Hidden pain

“Give a stranger one of your smiles. It might be the only sunshine he or she sees all day.”
– Shannon Kephart

She was young, smart, beautiful, professional, happily married and had what most would consider a great career. Looking from the outside, you would think she had it all together and that her life was great.

But her gorgeous smile and bright blue eyes didn’t show the pain she was feeling inside. It was a difficult time for her personally, but she didn’t SHOW it.

Sitting down with her over coffee, I asked how she was. And the truth came out. She was hurting, needed a friend, and greatly needed encouragement – and someone ready and willing to really listen.

If I asked you to think of someone you know who could use an encouraging word or a hug, I’m sure you could come up with several names.

But I wonder how many of those names would include people like my friend?

It’s easy to see those who often share their challenges, daily struggles and hurts as those who need to be uplifted. They walk around sad, with a cloud seemingly following them. 

It’s also easy to overlook those who may actually need positive words, caring hugs, and your smile even more – but don’t outwardly show or express their hidden pain. They may be some of the kindest, most helpful and most positive people you know, who seem to have it all together. But they are crying inside.

By making an effort to encourage everyone I meet, hopefully, I will also be able to catch those who secretly need it the most, but don’t ask for it.

Think of those who immediately and easily come to mind. Then think of those you consider least in need of encouragement – they are probably the ones who crave it the most, but receive it the least. 

Reach out to them and see the unexpected blessings you will receive.
You will be positively impacted even more than they are.